Sometimes I can hear my neighbours having sex. There, I said it. Apologies, neighbours, if you’re reading this! Not wishing to embarrass you or show you up – I’m just borrowing you as inspiration for this week’s blog. Hope you don’t mind!
It’s funny how prudish or embarrassed some of us can get when we’re exposed to other people’s lovemaking… but rather than feeling weird about it, I actually like hearing others in the throes of ecstasy. There’s something free and liberated about it, especially when we’re forced to live such regimented and repressed lives, with bodily functions kept hidden behind firmly closed doors, replaced by social niceties and polite conversation about the weather.
Sometimes I think it would do us all the world of good to shrug off our social restraints and run naked down the street once in a while. We shouldn’t feel shy about connecting with our primal selves, relishing our physicality and celebrating our bodies in all their rude and messy glory! So whenever I hear anyone enjoying noisy, enthusiastic sex, I will them on to greater heights, and higher volumes! (all the while hoping my wine glasses stay in one piece as they rattle away on the draining board).
There are one or two very good reasons why vocalising during sex is good for you. Like chanting ‘Om’ or practising a primal scream (more on that later), any exercise that creates a sound vibration in the throat can open up this area and regulate the throat chakra, our energy centre that relates to communication and creative expression.
Energy movement and sex are actually intimately connected – as you’ll know if you’ve ever been with someone who’s naturally vocal in bed. You’ll probably have noticed that the noises they made rose in pitch and volume as they approached orgasm. This is a sign that sexual energy is moving up from the lower chakras to the higher, more ecstatic ones. It’s even possible to manipulate and help this energy on its way by allowing the tone of your noises to rise during sex to help with the flow of energy.
Why is it so vital to keep your throat chakra open, and energy moving smoothly through it? Well, if a throat chakra is blocked or unhealthy, it can be hard to speak your truth, resulting in miscommunication and arguments. Physical imbalances created can include sore throats, gum and mouth issues, laryngitis, thyroid issues and teeth grinding at night. Incidentally, if you’re prone to teeth grinding, try rolling up a towel, then bite down on it and growl like a dog for up to a minute each night before bed. It might make you look a little demented (and it’s probably best to avoid performing in public, in case of arrest), but you’ll find that this can dramatically help to release tension, clear the chakra, and help you stop grinding.
Emotionally we can also become judgmental and critical when we’re not balanced in the throat chakra – which often relates to an inability to speak lovingly from the heart. Sometimes we can actually sense when the throat chakra is unbalanced, and if you’ve ever felt like your throat’s tight or constricted when you’re trying to communicate something important, it’s an indication of a blockage. Try this trick to help clear it. Get into the ocean, take a deep breath stick your head underwater and scream. This is called a primal scream, and is another great way to release ‘stuck’ emotions, pent-up frustration or anger and clear the blockage. You can also try this at home (preferably into a pillow, or underwater in the bath if you’re worried about the neighbours!).
To keep this area open and healthy on a sexual level, practice communicating during sex. All too often we’re too embarrassed or repressed to ask for what we really want. Expressing your desires can be empowering and lead to a sex life where fantasy can become reality. Also try giving yourself permission to moan and make noises and see how verbalising can enhance your experience.
Why not experiment with getting vocal in the bedroom (or bathroom, kitchen etc) and start enjoying some aural pleasure of a whole new kind.
In love and light,